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BigBrother 1 all the best stories and pictures BBC CASTAWAY 2000 ALL THE LATEST NEWS AND GOSSIP REGULAR UPDATES RICHARD BRANSON AND BILL GATES LOTTERY BALLISTIC MISSILES ON THE ISLE OF WIGHT? INTO V.W.BEETLES & CAMPERS? TRY THIS! PREGNANT? PLANNING A BABY? BUNDLE OF JOY ALREADY HERE? TRY THE GARDENCROFT PREGNANCY WEBSITE I WORK IN BIRMINGHAM'S JEWELLRY QUARTER SEE WHAT WE DO FOR A LIVING!
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NOT LOOKING GOOD IN one of the best TV moments of recent years, the Royle Family's head of house, Jim, watched Changing Rooms for the first time. An incredulous look was followed by a skyward glance and the question: "Is this what we've been reduced to, watching a bloody Cockney hammering in nails?" After the eviction of
the dumpy ball of hate, Narinder, last Friday, viewers could only wonder
what Jim would think of what was left of Big Brother. After all the early promises of sexual frisson, nudity and long-lasting hatreds, we were left with scenes of a Brummie building towers out of sugar cubes and a pasty Cockney eating sweet corn with a cocktail stick. But yesterday, when
even the red-tops were beginning to show dissent, the producers pulled
something out of the bag so perfect and so utterly tabloid that a BAFTA
most surely be on its way. By a stroke of pure genius, they managed to get the three women to strip off, oil themselves up and writhe around together in a tiny bathtub. The papers can hardly believe their luck. "Big Bruv babes
go topless in the tub", splutters the Star. "It's the sexiest
Big Brother yet," judges the Mirror, while the Sun leads with a
dirty, "Eye eye, girls", before obliging us with several topless
shots "deemed too rude for Channel 4's highlights". When you can get quality material like this by pointing your camera at a telly tuned to E4, who needs long lenses? But while the bath
scene turns the Star into a quivering wreck, spitting out sentences like a
deranged football commentator, the paper misses an even better moment
after the girls towelled themselves down. As the Sun and Mirror both reveal, Amma and Elizabeth (that's right, two ladies) snogged afterwards on the sofa. If the show goes on like this it may become unsuitable even for the tabloids. Razzle will be a far more appropriate publication to carry "the official Big Brother paper" moniker - that is, unless Narinder makes it into Asian Babes beforehand.
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2 -- AT GARDENCROFT
